so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
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