real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
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