bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
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