oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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