Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
