Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
