She went from zero to smokin in five shots
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
