a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize