drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
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