My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
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