Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
Terrible idea I love it
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
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