Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Sorry about my life...
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Randomize