At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
