guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Randomize