Non-Jews are for practice
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
