All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize
