i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
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he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
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We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
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