She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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