y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
