So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
