Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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