Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
