And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Randomize