where am i from again
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
