that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
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He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
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