Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
