I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
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