i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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