i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize
