fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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