once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
