On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
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