You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
