I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Randomize
