go do what you do best...puke behind churches
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Randomize