I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
