where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
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