wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I supernannyed him into submission
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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