from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
so much tequila, so little girl.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
