I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Randomize
