We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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