I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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