I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Randomize
