Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
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