Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Randomize
