So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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