I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
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You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
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That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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