I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
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its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
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oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.