where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
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