How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
